Dear Curtis

I am a single 8-year old male Chihuahua named Peanuts. I keep myself in shape at a trim 3½ lbs. My surroundings are plush and everyday I’m showered with love and attention from my human mother and father. Ahhhh… It’s a dog’s world isn’t it!

But, it wasn’t always this perfect. Eight years ago I was a homeless pup, aimlessly wandering the streets tired and hungry. I happened to follow an old man to his house where his family thought I was adorable and took me in…right into an empty milk crate without a blanket, food, water or toys. I was terrified (and still in psychotherapy over that one!). Anyway, one day while wondering about what was going to happen to me, a beautiful young nurse came to the house and, upon discovering me, scooped me up and tucked me into her sweater. We looked into each other’s eyes and at that moment I knew I had a mother, which is the reason I’m now writing to you.

I’m concerned my mother increasingly worries about my passing away as I get older. Hey, I’m relatively young, healthy and strong and feel I have many more years of living with this wonderful family. However, mom’s treating me as though I could pass away at any moment; always hovering over me and gushing about how much she loves me. Frankly, she’s getting a little too clingy. What’s a dog to do?

Curtis, I don’t know how to convey to my mother that I am not going to doggie heaven anytime soon. Although, between us, I am enthusiastic about one day eventually meeting Sir Rin-Tin-Tin, Lassie, Rover and especially Toby who inherited $75mil in 1932. I’ll bet he’s got a big fat bone and a nice soft cloud on which to sleep.

Anyway, my real concern is that when I eventually pass away, I need to know that mom will be able to cope with it. How do I relieve her of this fear. Please help.

Concerned About Mom

Dear Concerned aka Peanuts,

What a nice, caring and sensitive pooch you are! And, it’s probably that special sweet quality of yours that your mom appreciates and loves in you – and would miss when its time for you to join the great dog god Canus and all the other wonderful canines who have moved on to their next adventure, whether they be famous or rich or not.

And, the nature of how you and your mom met probably only adds to her missing you even before you’re no longer in this existence. After all, while she rescued you, you probably rescued her as well. The fact that she’s a nurse may also contribute to the situation as she probably has a big dose of TLC in her system and may be surrounded by illness and passing and sadness all too often, which cause her to hover, gush and cling.

Her premature missing of you is really something that goes a lot deeper than it appears and most likely has little to do with you. So, there’s probably little you can do to relieve any fear that you may be perceiving from her – which makes me wonder about the degree to which the fear you perceive is really coming from you. After all, dogs with the same background as you who were homeless, terrified and then rescued by a loving human may themselves be clingy. And when you add in the insecurities of a little dog, it’s not hard to wonder how much of her missing you is really you missing her.

So, what’s a dog to do?

Actually, not too much other than continue to be the terrific tyke you appear to be. If I were in your position, I’d enjoy my independence and being by myself whenever she’s at work or not at home…and I’d enjoy her hovering, gushing and clinging when with her. For however long either of you are in each other’s lives, practice the three “L’s”. Live, Love and Lick. As far as her coping after your passing, don’t worry. You’ll be in a wonderful place and humans are more resilient than some of us canines think they are!

Meanwhile, gotta run. Seems I could use some loving and dish out some licking myself.

Curtis the Dog

PS. I've included a chart of the life expectancy of dogs that you just might want to share with mom.